WITH ANDREA CRISP
“There is waiting when it comes to a dream fulfilled a promise fulfilled, and an opportunity fulfilled. But it also requires depth. And it also requires healing. And it also requires taking action and moving through moving forward. ”
About This Episode:
What happens when you're waiting, but things just don't seem to be coming together quite as you had intended, or quite as you had planned?
Do you often find yourself leaning into self-sabotaging behaviors, maybe even abandoning your dream, abandoning yourself, abandoning your vision? Today, on the podcast, I'm gonna get a little bit vulnerable with you and just share what has come up for me, when I find myself in that position in the waiting.
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Connect with Andrea on IG: @andreacrispcoach + @the.couragecast
Listen Here:
Your mindset is your greatest asset! But it is also what may be holding you back from taking that next step in your life. Are you ready to reframe your mindset so that you can step more confidently into your purpose?
0:01
What happens when you're waiting, but things just don't seem to be coming together quite as you had intended, or quite as you had planned? Do you often find yourself leaning into self sabotaging behaviors, maybe even abandoning your dream, abandoning yourself, abandoning your vision? Today, on the podcast, I'm gonna get a little bit vulnerable with you and just share what has come up for me, when I find myself in that position in the waiting,
You're listening to the courage cast a show to equip and empower you to live bravely. Each week, we'll share solo episodes and conversations with amazing people who have been willing to face their fear and pursue their purpose with a blend of practical and spiritual advice will help you take brave steps in your own life. Now, here's your host, mindset and competence coach, author, and your secret weapon.
Well, hello, my friend, welcome to The Couragecast. I am so glad that you are joining me today. You know, it is kind of a cool day here. It's a little bit overcast. And I have been feeling in my feels today, which is not really normal for me these days. You know, I've talked a lot about my struggle with anxiety and depression over the years, and how I have worked through a lot of that. And there are just maybe few moments when my anxiety flares up. Sometimes it's in a stressful situation, or, you know, when things seem a little bit more difficult than normal. But for the most part, I really have made huge, huge strides when it comes to just really being able to manage my emotions, my feelings. And for years, I found myself in this place where I was pretty emotional. I remember crying in, you know, meetings at work, thinking to myself, I wish I could hold it together, I wish I wasn't always, you know, wearing my heart on my sleeve. And I think I tried to, you know, get this tough exterior, and to put this hard shell on in order to protect myself in order to keep myself safe. And then over the years as I would go through things, I would bury those emotions, I would suppress them or push them down. And maybe you can relate to that maybe you've been in a place in your life where you have this really tough exterior, and you're always just wanting to, you know, show a brave face and emotions feel hard for you. And you push them down or you suppress them. But what happens when we do that is that we actually fall into a pattern of self abandonment. And we are not allowing ourselves to fully feel everything that is happening. Everything that is going on, truly allowing ourselves to be vulnerable to ourselves to the Divine to others. And we miss out on some pretty amazing things, including missing out on growth, missing out on opportunity, missing out on intimacy. So over this past week, I've been really processing some things in my own life and going through a releasing process of sorts. And looking back at some of the things that have been taking place over the past year, super grateful for what has taken place, but also knowing that in order for me to move forward, I have to make room for the new things, which means there has to be some releasing in the process. And a lot of that, you know can be tangible things actual, you know, material things in life. It could be ways I'm doing things. It could be how I'm showing up, but it also can be ways that I have been processing ways that I have been abandoning myself in order to make room for a more fulfilling place in my own life. Now there were So I really want to talk to you about this is because I think it's so important, when we are looking to make an impact in the world when we're influencing others when we are on mission, when we are driven to really be the best we can be, be successful in our own right. And I know that a lot of people that listen to this podcast are entrepreneurs, our coaches are creatives, people who are daily taking those brave steps in your life to move forward. And a lot of that probably looks like you know, taking risks and doing bigger things and putting yourself out there. But how often do we self abandon in hopes that we will get what it is that we truly desire?
Now, I want to talk a little bit about that today, because I think it's so important, what does that really even look like? So I actually wrote down in my journal, and I'm just going to read to you some of the things that came to me, as I was journaling through this just this morning. And I want to reference a song that I was listening to actually, and it's called, while we wait by Amanda Cook. And, oh, man, it's just so amazing. I definitely encourage you to go listen to it. So she talks about in the beginning of the song I was holding on with all my might, just praying for a ray of light, someone to hold me through the night, when I thought that I had lost my mind, when I was all alone and it got too quiet. You never let me go never left my side. Because you're with us while we wait. I encourage you to go and listen to this song, it is actually going to be like a healing balm to your soul.
And as I was listening to the song, and as I was processing through this, I just was so compelled to write down all of these things that were just like coming up with me. And it's been a long time since I've done that. As you may know, I used to be in full time church ministry. And a lot of what I did back then was writing and was speaking from the heart and was really sharing from a vulnerable place. Well, over the years, as I transitioned out of full time ministry, and I moved into coaching, you know, that had to shift a bit. But I feel like there is this opportunity for me to return to some of that today. Maybe I'll return to it more, I'm not sure. But I feel like there's an opportunity for me to return to it today. And just really allow myself to share from the heart and share some of the things that are coming up for me in hopes that it will help you and encourage you today. If you find yourself in a place where you are doubting that what you desire is going to take place is going to manifest. Now, when I first started out in my career, I really had a very, very strong faith. And my faith led me to believe that there was a lot of things that I was going to trust God in. But I didn't really have to do anything. And I've learned over the years that that's not exactly how it works. Or it doesn't work that way. For me, let's put it that way. There is a waiting when it comes to a dream fulfilled a promise fulfilled, and opportunity fulfilled. But it also requires depth. And it also requires healing. And it also requires taking action and moving through moving forward. And that can often look like different things in our lives. And that means that we have a part to play in that so when there is a dream or desire that we want to see manifested within our lives, see, see come to fruition. We have an opportunity to really move in that direction, allowing ourselves to move through that process. And when we're in business, often we talk about you know, like using this you know, boss exterior, this CEO being the the leader of our business, but you know what, we're human, we are all you know, made up of feelings of experiences of memories, emotions, things that have happened. And when we are moving through those things and processing through them, it is going to impact our business. It is is going to impact our clients, it is going to impact the people that we are working with constantly. Which is why it's so important that we do this work, that we pay attention, that we make sure that we own our power, and that we're not self abandoning when it comes to truly standing in our power in that divine light in that source. So one of the ways that often we do this is when we're self abandoning is we are allowing fear, and doubt and insecurity to be louder than any other voice. And that can come from, you know, failures in the past or rejection or hurt anything really, it can come from words that we heard spoken to us, it can come from, you know, missed opportunities that can come from, you know, just even our own deep insecurity of who we really are.
And when we allow those voices, those insecurities, those doubts, to become louder than anything else, we abandon ourselves, we abandon the dream, we abandon the promise fulfilled in our lives. And it's always been well, and put it this way, your ability, your capacity, your giftings, they've always been there, right? You're growing in them, you're maturing them, you're working through them, you are developing them, you are growing them right now. But when we allow those insecurities to like smother them, and like muffle them, and make them quiet, you know, we keep them from really being seen by the world and heard by the world, because we're letting our own doubt and insecurity be louder than the guests than the abilities than the capacity for what we have to give, when it comes to really making an impact in the lives of others. And I have found for myself, that, you know, there's often been these times where I want to project a certain image, I want people to see me as a certain person a certain way. And, for me, that looks a lot like trying to be perfect, and that, you know, stemmed back from my childhood, you know, being firstborn, doing things, right, always getting that, that praise and approval in my life and, and realizing, you know, even today I wrote down, it's okay, if you are not perfect, or there yet. And I think that is so important for us to really grab hold of because, you know, we really feel as though in order to show up and to make a difference and to make an impact and to have people hire us that we have to be perfect or something has to be just so in order for us to really call in those clients to call in those opportunities. But at the end of the day, it's going to be this quiet vulnerability to being ourselves. That is really going to be the measure of how we are calling in others, and how we are attracting other people. And here's another thing, your worth is not dependent on your success, or your outside circumstances. And often that's what we're you know, taught to to believe that you know, you're going to be successful when you're going to be worthy. When I was watching this Mel Robbins video today, actually about, you know, this girl said I'm fortunate enough to have two salons and Mel stopped her rate in mid sentence and said, it's really not about being fortunate. It's about knowing that when you say it's an external reason why I'm successful, then you're giving your power away. And here's the thing we have it within us already. So, your worthiness is not dependent upon what you do not dependent upon how successful you are, how much money you make, it really is already innately within you. And and that is when when we are truly connecting with our worthiness and truly connecting with our value and who we are and our identity and what we have to give and, and how we are allowing that to just come out of us. That is when we are in that full expression of love, not only for ourselves, but the divine for others. And when we're doing anything else spot that we're abandoning ourselves.
So, you're thinking, Okay, well, what does this mean? Like? How do I not self abandoned? How do I, you know, take ownership? How do I lean into this, so I have a few things that I want to share with you. First of all, allow yourself to feel and release. You know, we talk a lot about emotions. And I mentioned how, for years, I suppress my emotions, and I pushed them down, especially when it came to like anger, like, I just felt like, I could never be angry, and I could never really tell people how I felt, and that, you know, just shoved the emotion down, down, down, down, down. And I would never have a release for them. So they were like, underneath the surface, always, they're always kind of like, frustrating me and keeping me in this space where I was not able to move forward. So it wasn't until I acknowledged what I was actually feeling, and gave room and space for them to just be there. It's okay, like, it's alright, if you're sad, it's okay. If you, you know, feel down, it's okay that you know, you're frustrated or you're angry. And when you're allowing yourself to really feel that, and your body can feel that it processes it through, and it releases that emotion, and you're able to move through it. And it is really a beautiful experience. Another thing is make space for the tension. If there's this tension in you right now, know that the tension is there to grow you because where you are right now is not where you're going to be. And so you're maybe in this place where you're moving from something to something else. And there's this tension of feeling like I'm in this middle space, I'm in the in between. And like, as a song I mentioned with us while we wait, sometimes in the waiting in the tension, there's so much growth to be found, maturing, developing insights, so many really, really good things that are not only going to impact you better and impact other people in your life, your clients, your family, people you love. Another thing is lean deeper into the fulfillment of your desire. So how do we do that? How do we actually lean into it? Well, I talked about, you know, stepping into that next level, that new version of yourself, that version of you that you know, you are always meant to be. And here's the thing, you are already that person now. But maybe you haven't just seen the fulfillment of it. So lean in press into the fulfillment of who you are becoming of who that version of you is, that is really making an impact that is really being the fulfillment of the dream of the desire that you have for your life. The more you lean into it, the more you're going to see it come forth, the more you're going to, you know, embody it. And just allow yourself to lean more to that than into that old version or that insecurity or that self sabotage or any of those other things. Another thing is trust yourself. This, you know, like seems like pretty okay, trust myself, like what does that mean? When you're trusting yourself, lean into your own intuition. You're being guided every day there is source divine universe, God speaking into you speaking through you, you're a channel for so many beautiful things to come forth. And when you're trusting that you can hear that when you're trusting that you're being divinely inspired or led to move in a certain direction, then trust that that is for you. And so often what we're doing is we want to look for external validation, we want to look for those external voices or opinions or things which keep us you know, holding ourselves back. But when you just listen to that divine voice, your intuition, you are always going to be able to move forward. Be vulnerable, and open. And in this vulnerability, it doesn't mean you have to share like absolutely everything with the world. Like you've got to tell all of the all the nitty gritty of every part of your story. Not every part of your story needs to be shared. Sometimes it's the vulnerability of being in the story and allowing people to be a part of the story that really resonates with other people.
And when I was thinking about, you know, recording this today and actually putting this out, I felt like, you know, is this too vulnerable? Like, is this something I should be sharing? And the reality is, is, uh, yeah, I definitely think because it's, I think it's part of my story, it's part of your story, it's part of our collective story of really allowing ourselves to truly open up and be vulnerable with the people we're doing life with, and allow them to see in to who we are. So that we're moving towards the fulfillment of that dream of that promise of that desire. The next thing is Hold on, it's not always going to be smooth sailing, it's not always going to be you know, clear cut, you're not always going to have to, you know, know the right way to go. You might have twists and turns and ups and downs, but hold on, hold on to yourself, hold on to people you love, hold on to the promise, hold on, keep moving forward. And that's the last thing is keep going. You may be in a place right now, where you have really considered giving up on the dream. And let me tell you, when you give up on the dream you give up on you. Because it's not about one particular thing. It's not about like the dream being exactly the way you envisioned it. The dream, the desire is really about allowing yourself to fully engage in the purpose of why you're on the earth. And that can look like so many different iterations in your life. And in different seasons, it's going to look one way and another season, it's going to look another way, because you're becoming more and more and more of who you were created to be who you were put on the earth to be. And allowing yourself to keep moving through the process, moving through the emotions moving through, you know, the difficulties, the challenges, and allowing yourself to truly be present and in this moment, is going to help you to truly see that desire fulfilled in your life. And you can trust that in a waiting in the middle, in the parts that don't seem as shiny and spectacular. That that is really where all of us are. We only see these glimpses these moments, these snapshots of like, wow, I got to the end of the finish line. That's just like a little like moment, that's just a little snapshot of what we get. It's really always in the waiting in the middle in the tension in the growth, that you are going to allow that purpose to be truly manifested in your life. And see that desire fulfilled in your life. Friend, I just want to say thanks for hanging out with me. I hope this was helpful for you today. Just sharing a little bit from my own experience and from my own heart, I love to connect with you to hear you know what is what is going on in your life that is helping you to move forward and how are you being impacted by even, you know, waiting for this in your own life. So feel free to connect with me on Instagram. You can find me at Andrea crisp coach. You can also find me on Facebook, I'll leave all the links in there for you as well. And I would love to hear what's going on in your life. So please do reach out. Okay, friend. Until next time, remember, you have everything you need to live briefly.
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